Top 5 “Oh Snap” Moments of Aziz Ansari

Last Friday night was easily my favorite night of the semester so far. I was lucky enough to work the Aziz Ansari stand-up show in Memorial Hall. All throughout their performances both Aziz and his opener Dan Levy had me hunched over, uncontrollably laughing. If I wasn’t a fan of the headlining comedian before, I certainly am now. He claims that he always finds himself on trivial Top 5 lists, and in order to pay homage to his act. … I figured I could give him another one to (hopefully) stumble upon. These are my Top 5 “Oh Snap” moments from Aziz Ansari’s act at JMU:

Aziz and the Breeze-o-Meter

"Whoa! Who ate Aziz Ansari?!"

5) Aziz describing his hangout session with “Paranoid” singer Kanye West. I couldn’t even imagine trying to keep a straight face while walking into the infamous rapper’s apartment to see him bobbing his head to his own CD in his own apartment claiming “these beats are sick!”

4) Trying to explain how it would be possible for someone to have actually eaten him. So he might have gained a little weight…that still doesn’t explain the caption of one fan – “Whoa! Who ate Aziz Ansari?” From being a regenerating cannibal to someone making an “Aziz” suit after dining on the Parks and Recreations star – these theories were both absurd and hilarious.

3) The chronicles of Harris, Aziz’s “chubby” cousin. This combined visual and auditory impersonations of Harris stuffing his face with Cinnabon was almost too much to take.

2) Everyone’s favorite Funny Person – Raaaaaaaandy – made a much celebrated appearance during the show Friday night. The character’s an instant classic, and seeing it performed live was an amazing experience.

1) Aziz dealing with his rating on the Breeze-o-Meter. On Thursday’s edition of our newspaper The Breeze, the Aziz Ansari and UPB's Execcomedian placed very high on the scale of “What’s Hot” around the JMU community. However, he was ranked only second best – slightly beneath the annual music festival named Spaghettifest. The Observe and Report actor saw this rating and assumed that the event was literally a celebration of pasta – and that he was not quite as exciting to our campus as some good ol’ noodles. Needless to say this recurring joke was a favorite among the crowd.

There were many close calls that didn’t quite make the list (including Aziz getting in a car accident because he thought a girl had a beak….only to find out it was actually an ice cream cone). All I can say is that I’m glad that I took a night off from the typical weekend at JMU and got an opportunity to see and even take a picture with this up-and-coming star.

– Stephen

Aziz Ansari…One Sexy Dude

For the past few weeks I have made flyers, handbills, Grafton slies, breeze ads….etc….dealing a lot with the face/body of Aziz Ansari. Also, the name “Aziz” is kind of sexy itself…exotic and memorable, just like he is. I must admit he is a pretty sexy guy. I stare at his face on a daily basis….it leaves a haunting image that doesn’t seem to leave my mind. I am pumped to finally meet him in person today!! Take advantage of the last chance to buy tickets for the show this afternoon at warren box office…Trust me, you want a piece of Aziz. Not only is he HILARIOUS, but you also want to make the new marketing chair of special events (ME) look good…so just come to the show….you know you want to…and I want you to….so be there! It will totally be worth it!! I wish everyone a happy Friday!!!

Aziz Ansari

P.S. I can’t believe they are giving away two U2 tickets at the show!! This is SUPER exciting news for all you U2 fans and kudos to UPB for being AWESOME!!

<33 Jamie

To…Eventually…Do List: Aziz Ansari

So I had been carrying around Aziz Ansari flyers for about a week, constantly telling myself that I was going to hang them. I carried around the flyers in my bag, along with a generous supply of tape and a few push pins just in case. Every day I came up with excuses not to hang the flyers….and they were all really valid excuses. For instance: I had to study for a test after class, I had to do my homework, I had to eat a snack, I HAD to go to the gym, and I HAD to go to Walmart. (Ok I’ll admit….maybe not ALL of my excuses were so valid) Then I had the great idea of giving some flyers to my boyfriend and bribing him to hang them…and I started seeing a few around campus. (I know I am a little brilliant :).

Aziz Ansari

On the other hand, I am the marketing committee chair of special events and this is my job!!! I decided to gradually hang a few flyers around Showker, and some in the dining halls, and a few in the library, etc. I came to see that hanging flyers is really not that bad and I have no idea why I was avoiding it in the first place. Hanging flyers on campus was on my “To Do List” for a little over a week….and I was finally able to cross it off! I feel very accomplished! After all of that strenuous effort, I trust that everyone will read the flyers and of course writes down the date of his show in their planners. Aziz is coming to JMU next Friday, so it is time to crack down on marketing next week. I hope to see all of you at the show!

<33 Jamie

Stalking Aziz

Hello my name is Zach and I think I’m funny, not hilarious but funny. Someone who I do think is hilarious is Aziz Ansari. The first time I witnessed his comic genius I was procrastinating from doing my homework and decided on watching a late night talk show, Jimmy Kimmel Live! (not my favorite but a close second to Conan). I then saw him in Observe and Report when UPB brought the movie for one of its advance screenings last spring. He played a man named Saddamn who worked at the mall. Seth Rogen’s character Ronnie and Saddamn had the funniest scene in the whole movie with the best reference to Chik-fil-A ever. And if you hadn’t already guessed it Ronnie accuses Saddamn of trying to blow up the the fast food chain. Saddamn screams “Why would I blow up the Chik-fil-A , I f@!**ing love Chik-fil-A!”

Aziz AnsariAfter that performance and our joint love for fried chicken,  my relationship with Aziz took the next step. I began awaiting the third directorial effort of Judd Apatow, Funny People. A movie filled with star performances and cameos but the role I was excited for the most was Aziz playing Raaaaaaaandy with eight a’s. He plays an annoying and “Dane Cook” like stand-up comedian. Raaaaaaaandy also employs a djay on stage to really emphasize his hilarious jokes. What sealed the deal for me was a mockumentary on Raaaaaaaandy on Will Ferrell’s site which I found while searching for something that would give me uncontrollable laughter (p.s. I found it).

Now some may consider the above paragraphs slightly stalkerish. I say that it’s completely normal to imdb someone a few times a week, watch youtube clips while at work couple hours a day, and occasionally send him pieces of mail that may or may not include spiral notebooks filled with jokes and headshots of yours truly scented with Old Spice. Well anyways I digress Aziz Ansari is a rising comedian whose been on popular television shows and movies and I’m happy to present him to the JMU students on September 25th in Memorial Hall.

– Zach

Now A Lot Funnier Freakin’ Fridays

picture from wooters.netMy entire life, I’ve looked on stand-up comedy with disdain. I based this decision solely on the fact that when I was younger, I saw a few Seinfeld introductions that were painfully awkward and not the least bit funny to my six year-old self. This summer I happened to be flipping through some television channels, and saw Kramer describing a book about coffee tables, that itself can turn into a miniature coffee table. By the end of the segment I actually had tears in my eyes from laughing so hard. I then proceeded to watch as much as I could of my roommate’s collection of the entire series (that’s right — all 9 seasons). After this endeavor I came to two painful realizations:

1) I was moronic for avidly avoiding the show my whole life

2) Much to my dismay… I am George Costanza.

Lianna CarreraAfter giving up my ban on Seinfeld, I began to reconsider stand-up comedy in general. I’ve actually come to really enjoy a lot of the material out there (even Jerry’s himself)… Maybe all those people constantly quoting Dane Cook and Dave Chappelle were not that annoying afterall. Regardless, I’m fortunate that I appreciate this comedic medium now, because we have two comedians visiting our campus this month. This week we’ve got Lianna Carrera lined up for our monthly Funny Freakin’ Friday show at TDU, and I’m really looking forward to the up-and-coming Aziz Ansari‘s visit to JMU later this month. If either of these acts can come close to resembling what many now consider to be the greatest sitcom of all time, they will easily be one of my favorite experiences I’ve had at this school. Hope to see you guys out there.

“Just remember, it’s not a lie if you believe it” – George Costanza

– Stephen